Jealousy Doesn’t Look Good in a Suit

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I remember it like yesterday although it was almost 30 years ago.  I was a little girl and my older sister was in the town parade.  She looked beautiful and was getting lots of attention.   She got to ride in a fancy car, holding roses, waving and smiling to the crowd.  I don’t remember why she was in the parade but I remember watching her and wishing it was me.  My sister was always the prettiest girl in the group and it was “easy” for people to like her and want to shower her with attention.

We came home from the parade that day and I felt left out and I was sad really sad.  I went to my room and cried.  I felt like it was no fair that she was getting this attention.  That was the day I learned one of my most valuable lessons.  My mom came in to my room and she had no pity for me.  She told me to stop crying and that I was being jealous.  Jealous…what is that?  I asked her to explain.   She told me that I was feeling sorry for myself, because someone else was getting attention for an achievement.   My mom explained what jealousy was, told me to get over it, and never feel that way again.  I was shocked that my mom was not going to comfort me in my moment of need.  I wanted to feel like my sister, but instead I felt shafted and hurt.  After my mom left it hit me that my sister being in the parade had nothing to do with me.  My sister didn’t hurt me and certainly she didn’t want to make me sad.  She had earned that opportunity to be in the parade.  It was her moment and I would have moments in my life where I would want my sister to be happy for me.

So what does my childhood moment of jealousy have to do with business?   It has a lot to do with business.  I see jealousy daily in the business world.  Sometimes I even start to feel “jealous”.  So as soon as I start to hear myself say “I am jealous”, I immediately switch to the thought of I am really happy for that person.   The people you are happy for will be there to cheer you on.

Jealousy can run rampant in a sales team.  Being part of a sales group always it’s imperative to strive to be number one, and especially important to always be happy for others when they win.  If you can sincerely be happy for others and recognized the fruit of their labor you will learn from them.  Luck runs out and hard work pays off.

Successful people sometimes get looked down upon because jealous people wonder why they can’t have what the successful people have.  If you spend all your time worrying about what others have you will never make time to get what you want out of your career and business.  Celebrate the success of your peers, partners, bosses, and companies.  If you think they are undeserving then you need to make a choice to not be a part of their group.  If you work for a boss that takes credit for your work look for a new job.  If you find yourself secretly wanting others to fail then you will fail.  If you think successful people got lucky or had things handed to them then you are spending too much time worrying about those “lucky” people.

Don’t let career envy scare you from overcoming challenges.  Most of the people you are envious of have great stories of working hard and making their way to where they are.  Work harder and set high expectations for yourself.  Take the energy that you would spend worrying about others and worry about you and your goals.  Jealousy usually shows and I haven’t met anyone it looks good on especially in a suit.

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